Is This Relationship Honoring God? 10 Questions to Ask Yourself

When Love Feels Right—But Something Feels Off

Not every relationship that feels good is good for your soul.

Some love stories begin with excitement, with chemistry so strong it feels undeniable. You pray about it—kind of. You convince yourself that because it feels right, it must be right. But deep down, there’s a hesitation, a whisper in your spirit that asks: Is this really from God?

A relationship can be beautiful, passionate, even life-changing—and still not be honoring to Him. Love was never meant to be a reason to compromise your faith, your purpose, or the calling God has placed on your life.

So before you get too deep, before you ignore the red flags or silence that still, small voice—pause. Ask yourself the hard questions. The ones that go beyond feelings and into truth, integrity, and alignment with God’s will.

Here are 10 questions to ask yourself to know if your relationship truly honors God.

1. Is this relationship pulling me closer to God or further away?

Love should never compete with your faith. If your time with God has decreased, if your convictions have softened, if your passion for Christ feels dimmer because of this relationship, pay attention. A God-honoring relationship will always push you toward holiness, not away from it.

2. Do we share the same foundation of faith?

Attraction is powerful. Chemistry is real. But no amount of connection can bridge the gap of spiritual incompatibility. If you’re walking in two different directions when it comes to faith, eventually, you will have to choose between love and conviction. The right person will never make you feel like your faith is an inconvenience or something to hide.

3. Am I compromising my values to keep this relationship?

Love should refine you, not require you to become someone you’re not. If you find yourself justifying compromises—moral, emotional, or spiritual—just to keep the relationship alive, it’s time to step back. Love that requires you to shrink your faith is love that is asking too much of you.

4. Does this relationship reflect Christ-like love?

The Bible defines love not by passion but by patience, kindness, selflessness, and truth. A relationship that honors God will not be built on manipulation, secrecy, or cycles of hurt and apology. Love should not break you down—it should build you up in grace and wisdom.

5. Are we honoring God in our physical boundaries?

The world normalizes intimacy without commitment, but God calls us to something higher, deeper, and set apart. Physical boundaries are not about rules; they are about honoring God, honoring each other, and protecting the sacredness of what love is meant to be.

6. Am I at peace, or do I feel unsettled?

God is not the author of confusion. If you constantly feel anxious, restless, or uncertain about this relationship, don’t ignore it. Peace is a fruit of the Spirit—a relationship that is built on God’s foundation will bring clarity, not chaos.

7. Are we growing together in faith, or is it one-sided?

Spiritual growth should be mutual, not just one person dragging the other along. If one of you is constantly leading while the other stays passive, eventually, the weight of that imbalance will become too heavy to bear. A relationship centered on God requires two people equally invested in Him.

8. Do my trusted friends and mentors see this relationship as godly?

Love is often blind, but wise counsel sees clearly. If the people who love you—your godly friends, mentors, or spiritual leaders—express concern about this relationship, don’t dismiss them. God often speaks through the wisdom of others to protect us from heartache we can’t yet see.

9. Does this relationship allow me to walk in my God-given purpose?

A relationship should not distract you from your calling—it should fuel it. If you are abandoning dreams, ministries, or passions that God placed on your heart just to keep this relationship, it’s a sign that something is off. The right person will never ask you to sacrifice your God-given purpose for them.

10. If I remove my emotions, is this relationship truly honoring God?

Feelings are powerful, but they are not the foundation of truth. If you take away the emotions, the history, the comfort of companionship—does this relationship still reflect Christ? If the answer is no, it may be time to surrender it back to God.

What If the Answer Isn’t What You Want?

Maybe as you read this, something inside you is unsettled. Maybe you already know that this relationship isn’t honoring God, but the thought of letting go feels impossible. Maybe you’ve convinced yourself that if you just try harder, pray harder, hold on a little longer—it will all work out.

But love was never meant to be something we fight to make right. God does not bring confusion. He does not ask us to sacrifice our peace, our convictions, or our purpose for the sake of a relationship. He calls us to trust Him—even when it means walking away.

If this relationship is from God, it will not require you to betray yourself to keep it. If it is not from God, then letting it go is not a loss—it is an act of faith, a step toward the love that He does have for you.

Because the love God has for you will never require you to compromise your faith to keep it.

💛 The Salt & Light Family